One of the most significant areas of personal growth I've experienced is how to become extremely independent. I've taken many steps to become more independent and learn how to enjoy my own company over the last few years. I was able to do this through developing my knowledge, abilities and confidence to the point where I can do (almost) anything independently; from going to a restaurant and eating alone, through to travelling to different countries alone, and even moving to the other side of the world alone.
Humans are naturally social creatures and have evolved over thousands of years to be part of groups. Societies and cultures may be different all over the world, but the one aspect they have in common is social structure. With the government's order to social distance and isolate ourselves, it has become more important than ever to learn how to be independent and enjoy our own company. As this is something I've learned how to do quite well, I thought I'd share my advice on how to practice independence in order to avoid feeling lonely.
1. Get in-tune with yourself
Use your down time to explore who you are and learn to become your own best friend. Tuning into yourself is all about discovering and becoming aware of your behaviours, passions, triggers, likes and dislikes, fears, desires, needs and ambitions. You can go about discovering these in a number of different ways. For example, meditating, journaling, going for a walk, finding a creative outlet, practicing self care, or experimenting to discover your true passions. It is important to take the time to align within and understand your core values in order to live your best independent life.
2. Work on yourself to increase your confidence
After getting in-tune with yourself and figuring out what fears and mindsets are holding you back, it's time to restructure them. Focus on what is stopping you from being your authentic self and remember that thoughts are just thoughts - learn to push back on any negative or self-limiting beliefs. This will take practice, but your mind has the amazing ability to adapt to new thinking patterns and behaviours. Teach yourself not to worry about what others think - YOU and your fulfilment is what's most important.
3. Practice self compassion
Where ever you may be on your journey of self development, it's important to remind yourself that you are doing your best. Acknowledge that each day will reveal it's own set of challenges, but it's how you choose to overcome these challenges that defines you. Remember to be grateful for what you have; whether that be your health, your uniqueness, or how far you've come. Take the time to give yourself credit for the wonderful person you are and focus on the positive contributions you make to others' lives.
4. Plan and go on a solo outing
Anyone that knows me well can confirm that I personally LOVE my "me" time. As you are probably well aware, I'm a huge advocate for stepping outside of your comfort zone. I've always been fairly independent, but over the past few years I've taken this up a notch by doing activities alone that would usually involve someone else. You can start off small, for example, taking a drive to the beach and spending the day on your own. From there, you can step it up and take yourself to eat at your favourite restaurant, or go and watch a film solo at the cinema. Whatever you choose to do, make sure it's an activity you love. Doing it solo allows you to fully immerse yourself into the experience and you'll appreciate the moment even more.
5. Know your worth
This is a big one and is still an area I am developing in every single day. Knowing your worth and the value you bring requires love and appreciation for all of your personal qualities and attributes. Surround yourself with good people who empower and motivate you, and don't be afraid to walk away from anyone or anything that reinforces negativity into your life. There are many external variables that can influence our self-esteem, but it's important to control what you can through your relationships and lifestyle choices. Radiate positive energy and you will attract the same back!
I hope you've enjoyed this post and the content encourages you to discover and appreciate your authentic self. As always, I'm open to questions and happy to expand on any of the above topics.
Until next time;
peace and love,
Tina
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