Being vulnerable is the ability to live without defence. It is letting down the walls and barriers you have built up over time in order to embrace the human experience and live a fulfilled life. As you grow up, people build up these defences in order to protect themselves from certain threats to their well-being, but there does come a point where invulnerability can begin to limit your full life experience as an adult. That's when I would encourage you to start viewing vulnerability as a strength, rather than a weakness.
Why Do Some People Associate Vulnerability with Weakness?
Societal and dictionary-related definitions of "vulnerability" are often associated with weakness (e.g. words such as powerless, defenceless, hurt, attacked). Therefore, people have learned to associate any form of vulnerability (emotional, physical, social, economical) with negativity and have become fearful of external judgement when in this position.
The level of difficulty in opening up and being vulnerable varies from person to person. However, psychologists and research findings alike tend to view vulnerability as a strength for a number of reasons. It is much more beneficial to see vulnerability as allowing yourself to freely experience all of your feelings, emotions, perceptions, and ideas. Take a chance, invest in people, open up, and then adapt to the outcome. In the end, you will feel more fulfilled by taking that chance, than you would if you were to ignore the opportunity and close yourself off from life and the full human experience that comes with being vulnerable.
“Vulnerability isn’t good or bad. It’s not what we call a dark emotion, nor is it always a light, positive experience. Vulnerability is the core of all emotions and feelings. To feel is to be vulnerable. To believe vulnerability is weakness is to believe that feeling is weakness. To foreclose on our emotional life out of a fear that the costs will be too high is to walk away from the very thing that gives purpose and meaning to living.
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Vulnerability is the birthplace of love, belonging, joy, courage, empathy, accountability, and authenticity. If we want greater clarity in our purpose or deeper and more meaningful spiritual lives, vulnerability is the path.”
Dr. Brené Brown
What are Some Powerful Ways to Show Vulnerability?
Being vulnerable allows you to connect with other people on a deeper level. Because humans are social beings, this form of connection is innate and allows us to feel sympathy and empathy for others. Virtually every single person feels vulnerability to some extent and sharing in this experience with someone else can enhance a connection or certain experience for many people.
Some of the most powerful ways you can begin showing more vulnerability include:
Admitting and owning your mistakes
Being open about your fears and insecurities
Don't take yourself too seriously
Be true to who you are in all that you do
Share with others your process, journey, and challenges
Ask for and receive help from others.
Being Vulnerable With Yourself is Also Important
It can be a scary concept, but being vulnerable with yourself means to connect with the deeper things that are going on inside your mind. Rather than suppressing thoughts, feelings, or emotions, allow yourself to feel and process them. This will often encourage your mind to heal from past experiences or traumas, rather than ignoring them and causing further damage. Depending on the extent of previous emotional turmoil you may have experienced, there will be further steps you must take in order to heal, but this is certainly one of the most important changes you can make.
Allowing yourself to be vulnerable, not only to yourself but also towards others, is admirable. It is powerful. And, it is all part of being human. Don't be afraid to let down your defences, as you might be pleasantly surprised by the next turn your life could take.
Until next time;
peace and love,
Tina
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